Looking back over the last century’s science fiction and futurist literature two things come to mind, a lot was right and a lot was wrong. Sure, the very creation of past fiction can drive the development of future technology, but quite often even the cultural implications are wrong.

The desire for mobile personal communications can go pack past even Dick Tracy’s watch. The influence for a drive towards portable cell phones can be seen in Star Trek. You think cell phones would flip open if Kirk didn’t have a communicator that flipped open on his endless quest for ass? But one thing that was not foreseen was the cultural interference.

Sure, the ability to instantly communicate with and desired individual from anywhere on the globe is hella-sweet, there is a down side. I don’t mean the traffic accidents, additional museum signs restricting cell phone usage, or even the now-constant chatter in every library I’ve been to in the last decade. No, what I speak of is the cultural interference in a Redbox line. No one foresaw that individuals would someday stack in the back of a line while a woman with an unnaturally large ass talks on a cell phone with another individual who is equally fucking stupid about a movie that a third party might or might not wish to view.

Now, when I say she had a large ass, I mean it was fucking crazy huge. If the continental US was tattooed on her ass, you would never find Nebraska. If her ass were divided amongst five other women, they would still have unnaturally large asses. I’m not even sure why she was on the phone with one individual talking about what movie another individual might want to view. There is no way that a couch exists that would allow her and two other people to sit in any sized room to watch a movie, unless the movie was to be shown on her ass.

Why the fuck can’t people use the goddamned internet for what it was designed for, research? Why can’t they go to a fucking computer, look at what titles are available on an individual Redbox machine, and fucking figure out what they want? Why do they have to waist my fucking time?